Leadership is heart work.
When my son was in elementary school, we had a monthly father-son breakfast through an organization called All Pro Dad. One of the activities at the breakfast was called ‘Pass the Mic.’ During Pass the Mic, each dad would stand up and tell the crowd something awesome about his son. But there was one rule: dads could only speak about their son’s heart accomplishments. This meant no stories of sports victories or academic success, only heart things. It was encouraging to listen to each dad talk about his child’s heart. We heard stories of young men who were kind to others, compassionate toward those in need, and friends to others. The stories were powerfully contagious, too. My son often left the meeting motivated to try a new heart skill that he had learned.
As leaders, we can reduce our skills and leadership style into two categories: leadership of the head and leadership of the heart. Of course, leadership is much more complicated than that; it has layers and nuances. But if we could take all that we know about leadership and put it into only two buckets, most everything would fit in those two buckets.
Leadership of the head is our competency. It’s the skills we use to help people achieve success. It’s our education, experience, and leadership expertise. It’s all the words that are emboldened on our resumes. Truthfully, most of our leadership comes from this place. Unfortunately, we are leaving a lot of leadership ‘on the table’ when we only lead from our head knowledge.
Leadership of the heart is our compassion. It’s the skills we use to care for people genuinely. It’s the way we serve those we lead so that they can find success, even if that means a sacrifice for us. It’s about learning to understand those on our team and how investing in their hearts will make them better leaders.
As leaders, we must remember that leadership of the heart might be our most valuable form of leadership. Great leaders have heart leadership in their toolbox. They recognize that there are moments when a tender heart is as effective as a firm hand. When leaders are willing to develop their heart leadership, they are maximizing their leadership effectiveness. Here are some practical heart skills that will improve your leadership.
CARE FOR THOSE ON YOUR TEAM.
We have all known the leaders who cared more about the business or the bottom line than they did about their employees. This kind of leader devalues the importance of connecting with their team, and they often express that heart leadership is weak leadership. A recent HR study found that 90% of people who quit their jobs did so because of poor leadership. Great leaders recognize that the ROI of engaging their employees’ hearts is exceedingly high. Finding simple ways to care for those you lead strengthens your leadership and engages your team’s hearts, which increases productivity and loyalty.
Be intentional.
Create a plan and process to regularly celebrate your team members. A great way to begin is with birthdays and work anniversaries. Make sure to take a few minutes to celebrate these milestones with your employees. Provide them with a small gift or a gift card, or even a few hours of PTO. When leaders are intentional about celebrating their team, their team often finds an extra gear in their work output. Why? Because they will know that their leader cares for them.
Be thoughtful.
There are a few men in the organization that I lead who have achieved sobriety through hard work and a commitment to living a better life. The process of leaving addiction and embracing sobriety is a difficult one, and those who achieve it are worth celebrating. For each of these men, I have their sobriety anniversary on my calendar. Each year that notification comes up, I send them a short text congratulating them and expressing my gratitude. It’s a small gesture, but it has meant a great deal to those men. Thoughtfulness helps us care for those we lead more effectively. Think about what it would mean for an employee if their boss or manager remembered their wedding anniversary or their kids’ birthdays? What if the leader made a small entry on their calendar to remember the anniversary of an employee’s spouse’s death or the loss of one of their family members? Being thoughtful about the recurring grief of those you lead will endear you to your team and show them your genuine care.
“The heart is a muscle, and you strengthen muscles by using them. The more I lead with my heart, the stronger it gets.” Mark Miller, The Heart of Leadership
Maclane Forbus 